


Sunshine smile and bloody teeth.

by babyeblue_bb



Category: One Piece
Genre: (it's Ace and Cora), 5+1 Things, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Bittersweet, Blood, Canonical Character Death, Drowning, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Depression, Implied/Referenced Suicidal Thoughts, Luffy Being Luffy, M/M, Near Death Experiences, Poisoning, Post-Canon, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Swearing, Trafalgar D. Water Law Needs a Hug, Trafalgar D. Water Law-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:28:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22614874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babyeblue_bb/pseuds/babyeblue_bb
Summary: Five times Law saves Luffy from a certain death.And one time he is the one who needs to be saved.
Relationships: Monkey D. Luffy/Trafalgar D. Water Law
Comments: 11
Kudos: 269





	Sunshine smile and bloody teeth.

**Author's Note:**

> A lot of canon divergence in this, because I can. To clear things up :
> 
> #1 is during Marineford, very canon divergence, I'll let you see  
> #2 is somewhere between Punk Hazard and Dressrosa  
> #3 is at Zou  
> #4 is somewhere between Zou and Whole Cake. They had some things to do at another island before they got separated  
> #5 is at Wano  
> +1 is after Wano, post-canon
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy this! And also, english is not my first language, please if you find any mistakes, don't hesitate to notify me! (:

**#1**

There’s nothing left of Marineford.  
Nothing more than a bloody battlefield.  
Law silently watches the end of the war from his submarine, doors wide open, while Bepo anxiously yells him to get inside to avoid compromise their escape. The captain only listens to him with an inattentive ear, curious to see what will happen next, curious to see if that admiral is really going to burst a hole in his submarine, curious to see who will come to save them. It is with an almost disappointed noise coming from his throat that he sees the admiral stopping himself before he could do anything – well, he’d rather cheer up and be happy, after all, they came all the way here to save Strawhat, not to die here without doing anything.  
He can see Bepo collapsing from relief in the corner of his eyes as the doors finally close behind him, tightly shut, the boy’s infamous straw hat in his hand after that clown threw it at him, and the submarine dives in dark and cold waters in a second. Law trusts his crew to complete the escape successfully, there is no need to worry about this right now; they probably escaped worse.  
  
And Luffy is much more important.  
  
“Take care of Jinbei- _ya._ ” He orders the rest of his crew as Bepo leads him to one of the infirmary rooms where Luffy lies. “Do not disturb me.”  
  
“Yes, captain!”  
  
He drops the straw hat on the desk in the corner of the room before he starts to get ready for what’s next. The captain of the Strawhat pirates lies heavily on the bed, sheets under him already stained in red and heavy from blood, in a catatonic state. It seems like he was just back from hell – maybe this isn’t completely a lie. Law knows there are only two outcomes to this surgery: life or death. (And death seems _much more likely_ than life, at this point.)  
And, despite his title of _surgeon of death_ , he won’t let Luffy die from his hands, he won’t let his life slip away from his fingers.  
  
“Room.”  
  
He repeats all the necessary steps in his head, it was like a voice was whispering in his ear.  
It feels a bit reassuring, just a habit like another, a way to fool himself into thinking he is not all alone in all of this. Like there was an invisible hand on his shoulder, guiding him. _Now_ _,_ _you are going to wash your hands with great care_ _._ _And after this_ _,_ _you will pull up a brand new paper mask on your face._ _And the_ _n_ _, you are going to gather all the tools you need_ _._  
He feels stupid, when he notices himself thinking this way (as it actually became a strong habit, he doesn’t even notice anymore, to be honest).  
  
He feels stupid because, if he didn’t want to be alone and if he wanted to have someone telling him what to do, he could have simply asked his crew to come here with him. (He only pretends he doesn’t notice the voice in his head doesn’t have exactly the same tone as his. This isn’t _his own_ voice. He pretends he doesn’t recognize the voice, he doesn’t want to deal with this, he doesn’t want to admit it…) This is just a way to ground himself. A way to focus. A way to make sure his movements are accurate and his hands are not shaking.  
A way to reassure himself. But reassure himself from what?  
(Strangely enough, Law doesn’t want to know the answer.)  
  
His scalpel only millimeters away from Staw-hat’s pale skin, a sudden gasp stops him dead in his action. His eyes silently meet the younger captain’s ones and he doesn’t lose even a second: Law immediately gets up to grab some sedative before things get out of control. He didn’t think Luffy would wake up so soon; he thought he had the time to provide important and life-saving treatments before he could slow down and give him proper anesthesia. But the strawhat boy seems to have decided otherwise. A beginner mistake. Law makes sure to not look away from him for too long as he makes a mess of his shelves, looking for the sedative; he is ready to see Luffy try to escape or scream or anything else that could hurt him and be deadly for him. But nothing happens and Law is wondering if, actually, that gasp he heard wasn’t just his imagination… however, better safe than sorry, and now that he has a needle of sedative in his hands, he’d better use it.  
  
Back to Luffy as fast as he left him, Law confirms he _did_ indeed wake up. Visibly disoriented, his eyes are frantically looking at his unknown surroundings, each breath he takes is hurting and is more a pained wheeze than a real breath. Blood is running from his nose and his lips, and his eyes meet Law’s face. (The surgeon feels like he is looking at an injured animal, an animal that knows it is the prey and the hunter is around, an animal that knows it is going to die…)  
  
“Please…” Luffy’s voice is broken, hurt, stained with blood and tears. Each syllable feels like a torture. His chest is having trouble to rise up and down. “Save him… not— not me… save Ace…”  
  
Law feels his heart sink in his chest.  
  
  
“Save Ace…”  
  
  
He feels ice slowly coming down his back.  
But Law doesn’t have the time to feel unsettled. Every second matters and he already lost too much time. He can’t forget he currently has Luffy’s life between his fingers. The needle pierce through his skin and the clear liquid leaves the syringe.  
He closes his eyes for a second.  
  
_S_ _ave him, please_ _! I_ _don’t want him to die_ _!  
  
_Law can see how the sedative is already working up in the younger one’s eyes. He pulls up an oxygen mask on his face, looking away from him, wincing.  
  
  
“I can’t.”  
  
  
He swallows.  
  
_H_ _e got shot because of me_ _!  
  
P_ _ull yourself together_ , Law forces himself to stop thinking, scalpel again in his hand. This isn’t the time to think about _that_ , not right now, _not right now_. He needs to _focus_.  
So, this is what he does. His hands aren’t shaking.  
  


  
  


*

  
  
  
“How did it go, captain?”  
  
Law looks up to meet Bepo.  
The straw hat in his hands, he was looking at it without really looking, lost in his own thoughts, still a little blood under his nails, barely visible, despite having washed his hands again and again until they hurt. His mind is somewhere else, far away from the submarine deck where he stands now, sitting against the railing, breathing fresh sea breeze. It feels good, after he stayed in a little dark room for hours, the blood and medical scents that won’t leave his lungs.  
He takes a breath.  
  
“He will live. Probably.”  
  
His gaze meets the straw hat again. Maybe Bepo noticed something was off or it is just his instinct, but either way he sits next to his captain, a hand on his shoulder (his fur always seems to have a reassuring feeling attached to it).  
Law seems to be exhausted.  
  
“Captain,” Bepo seems unsure of himself, it is like he was taking time to think about his words before talking, “why did you save him?”  
  
No answer.  
  
“Don’t tell me ‘it was for fun’ because I won’t believe you. I know this isn’t something you would do. We’ve known you for so long, captain, we know you won’t save someone for no reason.”

Law stays silent for a moment, again.  
Then he just shrugs.

  
  
“He reminds me of myself,” he whispers, his eyes locked on the straw hat, “when I was young.”  
  
Bepo knows there’s no need to insist, sometimes, especially with his captain. A silence falls down on both of them, his hand still on the shoulder of the captain, his face shows concern and worry, but he doesn’t say a word. He knows that if his captain wants to talk about it, he will talk, and there’s no good in trying to get him to talk about what’s on his mind.  
Bepo knows this is hard. He can’t forget how they met, years ago.

  
  
Law closes his eyes.  
  


  
  


*

  
  


  
Exactly like Law predicted it, Luffy’s awakening is messy.  
_V_ _ery_ messy. He knows it because he can hear the screams echoing in the forest and because he can see the trees falling down one by one. He scowls at Jinbei, telling him _again_ how this is going to kill the younger boy if they don’t do anything, before the fish-man disappear between old trees. Law can’t go farther, he and his crew don’t have the right to step away from the shore – he already noticed all the angry mean looks the great Boa Hancock gives them when she comes to learn about Luffy’s current state. He knows his crew isn’t welcomed here. It’s already good enough they could stay here for now.  
Jinbei doesn’t take long to come out of the forest with a sleeping – or passed out? – Luffy in his arms, his face and his hands all dirty and his bandages coming off and bloody again. Of course this idiot reopened his wounds, Law was sure it was going to end like this the moment the saw him storm off the submarine, hitting everything he could hit, screaming until his vocals cords break. Law _w_ _as sure it was going to end like this_ and this is not reassuring. So, he simply did what a doctor would do: he patched up the younger captain, again, without a word.  
  
One time. Two times.  
Three times. And so it goes on. Luffy was sometimes asleep when the surgeon got him back and when he wasn’t, he would stay dreadfully silent, looking at something invisible while Law healed his old (and sometimes new) wounds. Law would always tell him, again and again, to try to not reopen his wounds, but Luffy wasn’t listening to him. Luffy was listening to nobody.  
The fifth time, Luffy finally spoke. On a second thought, Law wished he didn’t.

  
  
“Why did you not save Ace…?”

  
  
Law didn’t answer.  
There was never a sixth time. That day, Jinbei successfully opened Luffy’s eyes, finally, and the younger captain decided that, actually, destroying the entire forest and himself in the process wasn’t the best idea to stop his thoughts.  
  
And so, the Heart Pirates crew didn’t have anything else to do on Amazon Lily. They were all gone, without saying goodbye to anyone, gone into the dark sea in a blink of the eye.  
Law, slumped against Bepo like he always does, thinks again at his question; _w_ _hy did he save him_? Was an answer really needed? In fact, Law isn’t even sure he can come up with a clear and precise answer; it just happened like that, he didn’t really though about it, every second mattered and he didn’t have the time to think about that. It was instinct. It was a powerful feeling. A feeling more powerful than logic, probably. Some king of nostalgia. The urge to surpass that powerlessness he felt before. The urge to kick away destiny. The urge to have the power to change things. The urge to take his revenge on life.  
  
_He reminds me of myself, when I was young.  
  
_Law grits his teeth.  
Of course he remembers this. _Of course_. Even if he tries to minimize the feeling, even if he tries to ignore it or to deny it, he can’t just pretend he doesn’t understand: he would have _loved_ that someone was there for him after Cora-san’s death. He would have given everything to hold someone’s hand and to be patched up, to be looked after. He would have given everything to have someone give him comfort after he lost the only man he loved.  
And then, he suddenly saw himself in Luffy as his brothers died just before his eyes.  
He couldn’t just stay here, not doing anything. He _had_ to do something. It was like that voice in his head was screaming _‘do it!’_ and he knows very well who that voice belongs to. Shit.

  
  
“Captain, what are you thinking about?”

  
  
Bepo’s voice startles him. He hardens his grip around Kikoku.  
  


  
“Nothing.”  
  


* * *

**#2**

**  
** Luffy chokes up, he doesn’t move anymore for a second, then his hands fly to his throat, he coughs hard, he wheezes, he spits and blood flow out of his mouth. However, he shoots Law with a huge smile; a smile as bright as the sun. A smile stained with blood. A smile like he wasn’t currently dying.  
  
“Don’t worry! I am immune to poison, believe me, I am actually doing fine!” He says with a baffling enthusiasm.

“Explain to me how can I believe you, when you are literally _c_ _oughing blood_?” Law forces the younger captain to lie down on the dirty ground and to stay still. This fool just _w_ _on’t stop moving_ and he makes everything harder than it already is. “You wouldn’t say you _are doing fine_ if you could see your face.” Law spits these words with a scowl – well, he is not wrong. Luffy’s face is terribly pale, his skin so white that he could almost see through it, purplish and reddish patches cover his cheeks and his chest and Law knows _t_ _his means nothing good_.  
  
  
If he doesn’t do anything in the next minutes, Luffy will surely die.  
What’s the point in saving his life back at Marineford if he is just going to die right now in such an _idiotic_ way?  
  
  
“Bullshit! I survived a poison _way_ stronger than this one, just leave me some time!” Luffy pouts and he crosses his arms on his chest.  
  
“Well, let’s see who’s right.” Law grabs his wrists and forces them on the ground (this is surely the _fourth time_ he tries to get him to stay fucking still) to get easy access to his chest. He feels his patience running low and he wonders _how_ can his crew bear him all day long. _“_ Are you going to survive this poison or is it going to eat away your insides like it is actually doing _r_ _ight now_?”  
  
Luffy doesn’t answer.  
The surgeon is wondering if Luffy is actually deeply thinking about the question or if it is the poison having its effects on him. He doesn’t let the younger one answer anyway; he deploys his room with a quick movement of his hand, the other one firmly holding Strawhat on the ground. Feeling a bit unsteady – he doesn’t want Luffy to think that he is going to attack him –, he grabs Kikoku. A ray of sunshine catches the clean blade as Luffy’s gaze meet Law’s. He was just about to ask, but Law answers to the question he didn’t even have the time to ask. “I won’t hurt you, don’t get the wrong idea. I simply advise you to not move at all. Close your eyes, it is probably better for you.”

Luffy simply nods, like he just understood how serious it is. His voice is no longer cheerful, his eyes finally showing some concern for _himself_ , his shallow breathing worries Law. “No, I want to see. Is it gonna hurt?” The older captain winces and looks away. “Maybe.” (Should he tell him that he is about to witness how his whole body is going to be cut up in small pieces?)  
  
“Okay.”  
  
And he stays still, like he is waiting for his death.  
If one day, someone would’ve told Law that Luffy could stay still on his own more than ten seconds, he would’ve laughed and thought that it was a joke. And yet, this is exactly what is happening before his eyes. But he shouldn’t lose more time, thinking about this. So, he starts to get the work done, hunting every last molecule of poison that slowly kills the younger captain. He keeps looking at him every now and then, like he was waiting for him to do something stupid again, but Luffy seems to have understood that his life is on the line and now isn’t the time to joke around anymore.  
  
Law feels unsteady when he sees the… fascination on the younger one’s face. It looks like he enjoys seeing his body cut in little pieces like a puzzle. He even tries to catch one of the little pieces before Law stops him a cold and harsh “do not move”. Is it really a good idea to try and understand Luffy? He is sure that even if he lived _years_ with him, he still won’t understand even a bit of the younger captain’s mind. Law sighs, irritated.  
  
  
(But, to be honest, he prefers to save a wholehearted Luffy who is _himself,_ goofy and smiling; rather than save the Luffy he met back at Marineford and who he wishes to never see again.)  
  
  
And then, of course, exactly when Law is finally able to focus, Luffy is starting to grow impatient.  
_O_ _f course_ he is becoming impatient. Luffy lives like he is going to die a second later! But the surgeon is actually doing his best; it’s not easy to cut in little pieces the co-creator of an alliance he is in, in search of a strong poison. He _knows_ the younger one is getting more and more impatient because he can see all the insisting looks he gives him every five seconds, like he wants to ask something.  
However, even if Law knows, he is still startled by Luffy’s voice when it breaks the heavy silence that fell upon them.  
  
“It’s slooooow. I’m bored!” (Law really _wants to_ _h_ _it him_.) “Dontcha want Chopper to help you?”  
  
“No. I work alone. And I don’t think Raccoon- _ya_ will be helping much anyway. He can’t do anything i—”  
  
“Hey!” Luffy’s free hand grasps Law’s wrist, _hard_ , stopping him dead in his tracks. “I won’t let you speak of Chopper like that. He’s always helping as much as he can.” _  
  
_Law doesn’t say a thing for a moment, frowning as he looks at Strawhat. Luffy’s look sends him a shiver down his spine; it is so scary that he is wondering if he didn’t just use haki without realizing it. For a second, Law believes his face is going to meet with his fist.  
Ha, this isn’t what he meant… Never he meant to insult the strawhat crew doctor – as a fellow doctor himself, he values his work and he acknowledges how he is far from being an amateur, the little raccoon ( _reindeer—_ ) can be proud of himself. Law only meant that _in this particular situation_ , when he uses his devil fruit abilities, Chopper _c_ _an not_ help him. He is the only master of his _room_ , only him can finish the work he started and a pair of hands (or paws) will only slow him down, no matter what they do. Without any offense to anyone.  
It’s only logic. He cringes as he understands that Luffy probably thought he was insulting his doctor.  
  
“I didn’t mean this as a bad thing.” He sighs. “What I meant was… well, look at you right now. Nobody can help me, not even the greatest doctor in the world. You are in my _room_ and only I can fix you now, _especially_ right now. Do you understand?”  
  
Luffy nods as he lets go of Law’s wrist, a big sunshine smile replacing his angry eyes. “Your powers are so cool, Torao!” (Law is almost terrified by the sudden mood swings of the other captain. He’d better be careful the next time he talks about his crew-mates, not wanting to trigger another episode of this sort…  
Well at least, now, he knows that, even if they are in an alliance, he won’t get any privileged treatment. Good to know.)  
  
“Thanks… I guess.”  
  
Soon enough, no more poison was left within his system and once his body was put back, Law ends his room with a long sigh. He feels fucking tired and he wipes the sweat out of this face with the back of his hand, as he puts Kikoku back in its scabbard while he glares at Strawhat. _O_ _f course_ his face illuminates with a big smile, his hands touching his body like he wanted to see it in pieces again; he gets up with a giggle as he puts back his straw hat on his head. “Well, that was fun!”  
  
“That was f— you almost _die_ _d_ , Strawhat- _ya_!” Law chokes up on his anger, incapable to understand what was _fun_ in almost dying from poisoning. Something is _definitely_ off with this captain and Law wonders if he made the correct choice of a partner to make an alliance to _defeat one of the four emperors of the sea_.  
(Well. He is being mean. Luffy doesn’t seem entirely _stupid_ anyway; he clearly showed it back at Punk Hazard, he is just… awfully reckless. And Law can’t shrug it off like it was some insignificant detail.)  
  
“Huh, yeah, but I’m alive now!” He gets up on his feet then he shoots the older captain that big sunshine smile of his, while holding two of his fingers up. “Thanks Torao!”  
  


Law stops dead.  
Ha… of course, he can’t help but think about it.

  
(For a second, he almost saw Cora-san in front of him instead of Strawhat. But this is stupid, they don’t look alike _at all_. Luffy’s hair is dark while Cora-san’s was blond, their voices are nothing alike, Luffy doesn’t smell of cold cigarettes and gunpowder and Cora-san was at least the double of the other’s height… It makes no sense to compare them and yet, Law can’t help it. All of that because of a smile and two fingers.  
This is stupid.

This is stupid, _this is stupid, this is stupid_!)

  
  
“Whatever.”

  
  
Maybe he was wrong, back at Marineford.  
Maybe he didn’t save Luffy because he reminded him of himself when he was nothing more than a lost dying child in the snow. Maybe it’s the other way around.  
  
  
Maybe he saved Luffy because he _reminded him of Cora-san_.  
  
  
This is only logic, when thinking about it.  
Luffy, the boy who dared do the impossible to save his own brother, who was ready to throw away his own life only to let him live, no matter what happens. And Cora-san, the man who betrayed everyone he knew only to save a child he didn’t know from a scheduled death. Only for both of them to fail, in a way or another; Luffy by losing his brother and Cora-san by losing his own life.  
Shit. Law feels his heart hurt. Despite all the love he has for Cora-san, thinking about him still hurt deeply and he tries to not think about it for too long – he doesn’t want to feel weak when his name comes to his mind and he doesn’t want to feel weak in front of the other captain. He _can’t_ feel weak.  
  
Not anymore.  
  
(He longs for the day when memories of Cora-san will make him _smile_ , instead of this crippling feeling of dread that just won’t leave him.)

  
  
“What are you doing, Torao? Let’s go back to the Sunny already!”

  
  
Luffy’s smile brings back a warm feeling; warm like the sun and hot coffee.

  
  
Luffy _i_ _s not_ Cora-san.  
And it is better this way.  
  


* * *

**#3**

  
The Heart Pirates’ submarine wasn’t a quiet as Law hoped.  
After he reunited with his crew on Zou, after long conversations about everything that happened and especially about his alliance with the Strawhat Pirates, after the worried screams of his crew-mates when they saw all the wounds he had (and even more worried when they knew _how_ he got them), Law hoped he could enjoy some time for himself, to breathe, to process everything that just happened, to re-organize his thoughts and finally, to be alone. And this was exactly what was going to happen if it wasn’t for Strawhat and his awful tendency to let his curiosity control him. Of course, when Luffy learned that the Polar Tang was anchored on the foot of the elephant, he _absolutely_ wanted to visit it. (Law, at first, wanted to refuse, giving the excuse that it wasn’t the time to play around like a child and that Luffy actually already saw the submarine… _tw_ _o years ago_. But, then Law thought about it, and he decided to let go as he didn’t want to bring back painful memories, and also… now that everything about Dressrosa has ended, why not stop being so serious for an afternoon? It surely won’t hurt anybody, especially Law. He knows that Luffy isn’t as naive and stupid like most people think of him, and he too, sometimes needs to just stop and breathe. And, well, this is a way to thank him for everything he did, in a way…)  
  
And by “visit the submarine”, Luffy obviously meant “jump everywhere and scream about any little details, _l_ _oudly_ _”_.  
  
Sitting against the railing of the Polar Tang, Law somehow tries to relax, his eyes tightly shut, as his tries to ignore therelentless screaming of Luffyand the intrusive questions of Penguin and Shachi about his relationship with Luffy.  
They are in an alliance. That’s it. There’s nothing more.  
He really doesn’t understand how these two can think about something else.  
  
  
  
With a small smile, Law notices how much he missed his crew.  
  
  
  
He honestly believed he would never see them ever again.  
He honestly believed he would never leave Dressrosa alive.  
He knew it. The second Luffy agreed to make an alliance with him to defeat Doflamingo, he knew he was going to die. But he didn’t. And now he feels… weird. Relieved, of course. But he just feels empty, he feels the void inside him – but not the same that he felt for all these years. Not the same void that prevented him from smiling genuinely or from laughing without an afterthought. Not the same void that Cora-san left behind him and not the same void that Law desperately tried to fill with his hate for Doflamingo. No, this isn’t the same void; the one he feels now is asking endlessly “ _w_ _hat am I l_ _i_ _ving for_ _?_ ”.  
  
“ _W_ _hat is my purpose in life_ _?_ ”.  
  
Before all that, Law had only one answer: he lived to kill Doflamingo, as simple as that.  
But now… now, what?  
  
Now, he is scared of the answer to this question.  
(He is scared because he fears the answer is “ _nothing_ _”_. And he doesn’t want to admit it, he _can’t_ admit it. How much of an egoist is he when he feels this way, after Strawhat and his crew did so much for him? How much of an egoist is he towards his crew, who was waiting patiently for him when he was just trying to die? How much of an egoist is he towards his alliance, towards Dressrosa, towards all the lives that were lost? Law doesn’t have the right to feel this way, he can’t allow it, he should be glad to be alive, to be back with his crew, to know he can count on another captain. He should be glad, he should be happy…  
  
Why is he so… complicated?)  
  
  
_Splash!_  
  
  


A crushing silence fall upon the submarine deck.

  
It happens so suddenly that it alerts Law. He opens his eyes, he looks around the deck of the Polar Tang. He quickly notices some of his crew-mates looking above the railing, leaning above the sea, voices talking over other voices. His hand grasps Kikoku, and the captain gets closer to the little group, he tries to look at the sea too. “What is happening here?” He notices the scared looks all his crew-mates give him. Penguin is the only one who answers with a shaky voice. “Luffy fell into the sea…”  
  
“What?!”  
  
_O_ _f course_ Luffy is _stupid enough_ to fall into the water, on his own, while visiting a fucking submarine!  
  
“He was bouncing everywhere and then he tried to get up the mast. He lost his balance and he just fell… Bepo followed him in the water… but the sea is so rough because of the elephant, I’m afraid he won’t…” Penguin trailed off, the end was left unsaid. But there was no need to say anymore to know what he means. Sure, Bepo is an excellent swimmer, he is a polar bear after all, Law trusts him, but…  
  
Law feels his blood run cold.  
Why does this fool always manage to risk his life even when there is no danger _at all_? He hears the sound of Kikoku rattling against the deck after he drops it but his mind doesn’t process it, his body is moving on its own to get closer of the ocean, he pushes his men away to make his way to the railing, his hands grasp the railing so hard his joints become white. Shit, _shit_. Why is he so stupid? Why is he so reckless? How come nobody was looking at him for one second? How come that was _enough for him to fall into the sea_? (Law watches the sea like he could find the answer in the waves.)  
  
He doesn’t notice he is holding his breath until Bepo appears on the sea surface, Luffy secured in his arms.  
  
“Help him get back to the deck! Shachi, bring me back my sword”. Law orders and the group immediately separates and obeys their captain, only Penguin stays by his side, Law can hear footsteps echoing away on the deck but he doesn’t pay much attention. He leans to the water, to his navigator, to Luffy. “Bepo!” The navigator quickly understands what his captain wants him to do; he rises Luffy as high as he can, above the water, careful to not make him fall into the water once again. With a flick of his hand, Law deploys his room and the next second, Kikoku appears in Bepo’s paws.  
Behind him, he hears an ‘oof’ coming from Shachi, who almost let the younger captain who suddenly appeared in his arms fall down. Penguin rushes to his side to help him, but he stops with a gasp. “Captain, he’s not breathing!”  
  
  
Law is sure he feels his heart stop.  
  
  
He doesn’t hesitate a second. He shoves away the two men, he lets Luffy down on the deck, his straw hat is quickly brushed away, well at least his opened shirt makes things easier, his thoughts are getting messy, his hands too as he starts to panic and Law doesn’t even look for a pulse before he starts the chest compression. (A single though lingers in his mind: does it work on a _rubber_ man?) Penguin and Shachi can only look, scared of what will happen if the boy doesn’t wake up. They count the number of compression with Law, until they hit thirty. Two long mouth-to-mouth breaths and Law resumes the chest compression, cursing under his breath as the pain in his right arm awakes. He hits thirty again, but half a second before he could give rescue breaths again, Luffy suddenly gets up – _violently_ banging his head against Law’s, who fucking feels his skull crack –; he coughs hard and he spits water, he wheezes and he tries to talk but he is stopped by more coughing. He seems confused.  
  
“Put him in a room.” Law orders his men as he brings a hand to his face. “Make sure to give him dry clothes. Check him up, just in case.” Penguin and Shachi don’t wait long before they get in action, as they both grab Luffy’s arms. “Yes, captain!”  
  
Law sits on the deck as he hears the younger captain protest until his voice is out of earshot. His hand moves to his right arm, burning with pain again, his fingers brush the tight bandages under his jacket. He sighs. His heart doesn’t seem to want to calm down and he ponders what the _fuck_ just happened.  
Everything was so calm, only minutes ago. How can this happen so suddenly? Luffy is really a fool and it _angers_ him. He rubs his hands on his face and he grunts.

In the corner of his eyes, he notices Bepo who is coming towards him, he looks like he is sorry – _w_ _hy_ is he sorry when he just saved someone from drowning? A thick blanket is carelessly thrown over his shoulders and water drops from his fur. He holds Kikoku in one paw and Luffy’s straw hat in the other.  
  
“Thanks Bepo.” Law gets his sword back (and he wonders why is he thanking him, because he saved Luffy or because he brought him Kikoku back? Probably both.). “You okay?”  
  
“Yes, captain,” Bepo shows him the straw hat, “should I bring this back to Strawhat?”  
  
“No, leave it to me.” He grabs the straw hat, Kikoku back on his shoulder, before he gives a little smile to his navigator. “You should go inside, I don’t want you to catch a cold.” He goes inside too, wincing because of the pain in his arm, as he tries to follow the trail of water to determine in which room the other captain was taken. On the way, he comes across Penguin and Shachi who tell him in which room is Luffy before they both flee after they gave a little pat on their captain’s shoulder.  
  
Law opens the door of the room without knocking and he finds Luffy sitting on a messy bed, wearing one of the bright-colored Heart Pirates’ suits, an unusual thoughtful expression on his face. There’s still little water droplets in his dark hair and when he notices Law, his usual smile illuminates his face.  
The surgeon closes the door behind him. He lets Kikoku against the wall near the door and he throws the straw hat to the younger captain before he sits down on a chair in front of the bed. (It feels a bit strange to see him wearing a suit from the crew… as if he was part of the Heart Pirates. Law tries to not think about it too much.)  
  
“Thanks Torao!” Luffy laughs and his smile won’t leave his face. But Law is not smiling. “Why are you thanking me? Because I brought your hat back or because I saved your life, _again_?”  
  
Luffy doesn’t answer. So, Law speaks again: “ _H_ _ow many_ times do I have to say it, Strawhat- _ya_? You are too reckless! You risk your life for anything stupid and today is no different: we’re supposed to find a way to bring down Kaido – or, at least, _you_ and your crew are supposed to find a way to bring back your missing crew-mate –, but we’re losing time because you always do something stupid! You almost drown! You weren’t breathing anymore!”  
  
“But I am breathing, now—”  
  
“I don’t care! For once, would you please understand that saving you every time you almost die because of your foolishness is _not funny at all_? You were _drowning_ and you don’t seem to understand that, I, too, will drown if I fall into the sea. If we were alone, just you and me, you would have died!”  
  
“But we weren’t alone. And I trust your crew, most of them are as smart as you or Chopper, I surely can’t die with you all!”  
  
Law really _wants to kill him_.  
  
“That doesn’t mean you have the right to be awfully reckless.” He crosses his arms, his hand absently touching where his arm hurts, frowning even more. Luffy can’t seem to understand that it only needs a second for everything to be fucked. When he listens to Luffy’s crew, his reckless and possibly suicidal actions are nothing new and Law can’t help but feel worried. Is Luffy just entirely and deeply dedicated to his dream and his crew or does he want to die? Strangely enough, Law doesn’t want to know the answer. “What will happen the day you really die, for good? You don’t even care, am I right? Do you really have so little esteem for your crew?”  
  
Luffy’s smile disappear, visibly upset. The older captain puts his finger right where it hurts. “Don’t say that, this isn’t the truth. I value my crew-mates’ life more than I value my own.”

(Even if his answer doesn’t bring any surprise coming from the younger captain, it doesn’t satisfy Law. It only makes him worry even more for Luffy’s mental health. Is it a way to show how much he cares for his crew or does he actually don’t value his life at all?  
Law decides that he should try to learn more. But not today.  
Not when he can’t even find the meaning of his own life.)  
  
Law sighs and he gets up, walking towards the door. He puts Kikoku back on his shoulders and he doesn’t look at Luffy. “Then act like it and don’t waste your life on such trivial things, I won’t always be there to save you. Next time, I’ll let you drown.”  
  
As he was about to leave the room, he hears the younger captain’s laugh in his back. _Fucking mood swings_ … nobody can ever know what’s on his mind. Law turns towards him as he greets his teeth. “What?”  
  
“You know, these Penguin and Shachi guys, they told me something very interesting about you.” Luffy says with a big sunshine smile on his face. “What?” Law says again.  
  
“They told me they never saw you looking so worried before!” Luffy laughs again then he asks: “You were worried about me, Torao?”  
  
Seriously?  
Law grabs the door handle as he frowns. “Shut up.” He mumbles under his breath before he leaves the door. He slams the door, as if to let Luffy know how angry he feels. “You didn’t say no!” He hears the shouting voice of the younger captain, muffled behind the door, and he rubs his hand on his face with a long sigh.  
  
It took him less than five minutes to find Penguin and Shachi, on the deck of the submarine, taking a nap like nothing just happened. He wakes them up, poking them with the scabbard of his sword.  
  
Law leans on them, smiling. “Tell me… did you guys ever got your head chopped off?”

* * *

**#4**

It was Marineford all over again.  
This is what it feels like to Law, as Luffy is lying on the bed in the infirmary room, bleeding everywhere on the before clean sheets, half conscious and confused, his breathing so shallow Law can’t even hear it. His wounds are not as bad as the ones he suffered back at Marineford but they are still life-threatening and Law doesn’t have much time to lose. He doesn’t even know what happened and to be honest, he doesn’t care much; he already knows that the younger captain acted carelessly _again_ to save whoever he saved, not caring for his own life, as usual. And, as usual, his actions leave a troubled and worried feeling in the surgeon’s chest, who ponders when will be the _last_ time he does this.  
  
A syringe filled with sedative in his hand, the older captain was about to administer it to Luffy when he grasps his wrist. Weak fingers around his arm, Law could easily break free from his grip but he doesn’t move, his gaze meets Luffy’s. “Ho… how…” Luffy coughs, he takes a shaky breath, and he comes again. “How is m— my crew…? Where… where are they? A— are they safe?”  
  
Law bites his lips.  
The poor boy is loosing all his blood on the floor of the room and the first thing he worries about is the well-being of his crew. Law doesn’t even know why it still surprises him. He sighs, as he sticks the needle in the arm of the captain. “They are fine. They are injured, but those wounds are not fatal, they are safe. My crew is taking care of them.”  
  
“Good.” Luffy closes his eyes.  
  
A silence falls in the infirmary and Law gets to work, uneasy feeling in his chest, the _voice_ comes back again in the back of his mind. _N_ _ow_ _, y_ _ou will start to treat the most alarming wounds_ _…_ (But what is the most alarming? The wounds or Luffy’s words?  
Law can’t run away from this anymore. He pushed away, again and again, the moment when _this_ conversation should happen, but now he needs to stop. He feels like the younger captain is slipping away from him, slowly.)  
  


*

  
  
  
The room was quiet, except from the regular _beep beep_ of the electrocardiograph machine and Luffy’s breathing. Once the surgery was done, Law took the time to clean his tools and to store them neatly like he always does, before he cleaned the whole room. After he made a round in the submarine to ensure that everyone was there and above all, safe, he returned to Luffy’s room (after he took care to order his crew to “make sure nobody disturb them”). Sitting against the wall facing the bed, Kikoku on his shoulder, Law watches the sleeping pirate, lost in his thoughts.  
(How can he throw his life away for so many different reasons each time, when _he_ still didn’t even find his own reason to life? Yes, he still has his crew, and the One Piece to find, and they still have to beat Kaido’s ass… but that was nothing compared to his fight with Doflamingo.  
There is nothing more than this emptiness in his chest.)

  
  
Luffy woke up several hours later, jut as Law started to fall asleep, but he quickly cracks his eyes open when he hears the beeping of the machine becoming faster. Law looks up, and he notices that Luffy sat up in the bed, taking away the oxygen mask that was on his face. His hand shoots up in his hair, his other hand soon follow the first before they start heading in his back, as if he was looking for something… Law immediately knows what he is searching for. “It’s on the nightstand next to your bed.” He says as he looks at the said nightstand. His straw hat was lying on the table and Luffy quickly grabs it before he puts it on his head, big smile on his lips.  
It’s almost unnerving. But, then, Law is starting to get accustomed.  
  
“Thanks Torao!” His voice is raw, a bit broken. He laughs while rubbing a finger under his nose, as he looks at all the bandages that cover his wounds, the multiples tubes he is attached to, the machine that registers his heartbeat. Then, he looks at Law, still with this smile of his. “Where is everyone?”  
  
“Probably sleeping in a room.” Law shrugs. The only porthole of the room gives no light, maybe because it was late in the night, maybe because the submarine was deep into the seas; the only light source of the room was a candle near the bed. “They are all fine. I went to see them, earlier.”  
  
“Oh! I want to see them!” Luffy shouts as he starts to kick away the sheets that were covering him. But Law is faster than him and in a second, he is by his side, a hand on his shoulder, forcing him to lie down in the bed. “You shouldn’t get up right now. Your wounds are still fresh and they could open up if you move too much. And you were about to tear away your tubes. Stay calm, at least for the night. I promise you they’re all fine.”  
  
Much to his surprise, Luffy stays still instead of trying to get up no matter what (maybe Marineford is still too fresh in Law’s mind but it feels a bit strange to see Luffy smiling in the same bed he almost died two years ago). “Okay, I believe you, Torao!”  
  
Law shrugs, he grabs a chair nearby and he sits down next to Luffy’s bed, looking at the wounds to see if everything seems fine. He puts his hand on his forehead to ensure he has no fever. Luffy pouts. “You’re not gonna lecture me?” “Lecture you? Why?” Law shuts down the electrocardiograph machine, the never-ending beeps were starting to get on his nerves.  
  
“You always lecture me when I get into trouble and end up getting hurt.”  
  
Well, he is not wrong. But Law isn’t in the mood for this, today. He thinks about something else, things more important than an argument that will end like it started, like every time he tries to talk with such a stubborn like him.  
  
“Not today. I’d like to talk about something else with you.”  
  
“Talk about what?”

  
Law hesitates. Is it really a good idea?  
(He sees his fingers shake when he takes off the sticky electrodes off of Luffy’s chest.)

  
  
“What do you live for?”  
  
“Well, to become the king of pirates, of course! But I thought you already knew that?”

  
  
Ha. Obviously. That was stupid. Law is baffled by the way the younger captain easily answered, baffled by his genuine smile and his confidence, baffled by so much honestly, baffled by the lightness of his heart. Baffled by the sun that shines in his smile. He just stays still, mouth agape, as he tries to hide what he feels and what he is thinking about. But given how Luffy stops smiling, he probably noticed it anyway – but before he could say anything, Law speaks again. “Then, why are you always ready to throw everything away, like you always do? Why are you ready to give up on your dream without looking back?”  
  
Luffy thinks for a second. “Because I promised them. I promised my crew that I’ll help them realize their dream, no matter what. So I can’t let them die. I can’t. Their dream is more important than mine. And if I have to die to help them achieve their dream or to save them… I won’t hesitate.” His serious tone is so unusual. “And besides, I can’t become king of pirates without them!” He smiles again with a giggle. “I need them and they need me!”  
  
(He says this like it’s the easiest thing in the world.  
Law closes his eyes for a second.)  
  
“I see.” A strange feeling lodges in his throat. He finds it difficult to breathe.  
  
“Why did you ask?”  
  
Right, _why did he ask_ _?_ Law already knew that Luffy would give him one of those naive and stupid answers like he always does, but honest and there is no doubt that it’s the truth. He knew but he asked anyway, like he was waiting for something else. He wonders why did it surprise him.  
  
  
Seeing the surgeon won’t answer him, Luffy speaks again. “What do _you_ live for, Torao?”  
  
  
Law freezes, taken aback.  
He didn’t expect the younger one to turn the question around.  
  
Is it a good idea to open up to him? Law is used to keep his problems and his worries to himself, afraid that his weakness could be used by the enemy to hurt him and even kill him. But Luffy isn’t an enemy. And well, he _did_ open up to him about Cora-san and Flevance, just like Luffy opened up to him about his brothers and his worries about being too weak. Does he have the right to lie to him, after everything he did for him?  
Law is just afraid to face the truth.

(Shit. He meant to talk about this because he thought Luffy was fucking suicidal and he just wanted to make sure he _wasn’t_. How come _he_ is the one to open up?)

  
“I…” He takes a deep breath, trying to gather up his courage. Why is it so hard? It doesn’t make any sense. “Luffy- _ya_ , I— I don’t know. I don’t know anymore.”  
  
“You don’t know?” Fuck, the concern in Luffy’s voice makes his heart hurt.  
  
  
Law hides his face behind his hands, he closes his eyes. “For thirteen years, my only purpose was to kill Doflamingo. I lived only for this moment, my hate for him was the only thing that made me stay alive. But now… Now, he is out of the picture and I don’t know what to look forward to. I don’t know what to do. Don’t get me wrong, I was happy that he got what he deserved… but I just feel… empty.” He sighs, his fingers grasp his hair. “You know, I was convinced I would die back at Dressrosa, and that was fine with me, really. But you saved me. And I never took the time to think about what to do next, because I never thought I would leave this town alive. So I… I just… I don’t know. I don’t know what to do anymore. Every night, I ask myself _what do I live for_ and I never find a satisfying answer.”  
  
He stops for a second, just breathing, feeling something like a sob going up his throat. “I wish I could be like you…” He mumbles under his breath, pulling at his hair.

A pair of warm hands gently grabs his own, slowly sorting out his fingers from strands of hair. “Law.” The hands move to his head and to his shoulders. Law looks up to Luffy. (Why does it look like he is about to cry?) “It’s okay.” He says and Law thinks it’s not. “It’s okay to feel lost. I was, too, after Ace died. I didn’t know what to do anymore but then, I remembered I had my crew. You just have to remember, too. Maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, maybe next year, who cares? You can be slow if you want to! And it’s okay to feel sad or to feel weak, even if you think it’s not. I mean, you’ve been through a lot recently and when I look at you, it feels like you’re never able to catch your breath!” Sitting on the edge of the bed, Luffy pulls Law into a warm embrace, his arms around his shoulders and his cheek buried in his dark bangs, not caring for the multiples tubes wanting to pull out from his arms. “You’re always holding everything inside of you and you never spill it out. I mean, we’ve been together in this alliance for so long but I don’t even know that much about you! I think it’s time for you to stop thinking so much and let go of that burden, don’t you think?”  
  
Law doesn’t answer, he bites his lower lip, tears threatening to fall from his eyes. “Torao,” Luffy whispers against his hair, “ _I will_ find you something to live for, okay?”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
“I promise you.” (And Law knows, _he know_ _s_ Luffy never breaks his promises. It is the very reason he is in this bed right now, covered in bandages and painful wounds.)  
  
“Okay…”  
  
“Good!” Luffy laughs, holding the older captain closer to his chest.  
  
And, fuck, Law is sure this laugh makes his heart stop.

* * *

**#5**

**  
** Law saw everything.  
He saw everything from a distance and he can’t help but feel his heart sink.  
His opponent down, he turned around to see how Luffy was doing – _a_ _s usual_ , he’s got into trouble and this time, he brought Law with him –, if he needed any help or on the contrary, if everything was fine.  
  
  
Everything was not fine.  
  
  
He saw the look on Luffy’s face shift, going from this ironclad confidence to a nameless fear, he saw his eyes look at the blood on his hands – his own? His opponent’s? Does it matter? –, he saw how his breathing stopped, how his hands shook, how his legs couldn’t carry him anymore, how his knees badly hit the ground, how he wanted to scream but couldn’t. He saw his enemy trying to take advantage of the situation, as he rose his sword high, right above the back of the neck of Luffy. Law saw everything and he _prays_ for the range of his room to be big enough to reach the younger captain, before he could switch his place with an insignificant pebble. Luffy doesn’t notice either that he moved or Law grabbing his arm. He continues to switch their place, without taking the time to think. Law lose the count of the number of time he switches their place for a rock or a flower and he stops only when he decides they are far enough from danger, hiding behind a crumbling wall.  
He feels tired and he’s having a hard time trying to catch his breath, as he looks at Luffy.  
  
Even a blind man would understand what is going on.  
  
And Law is not blind nor deaf; he heard when the younger captain was having nightmares, sometimes the screams and the muffled sobs, sometimes the voices of his crew-mates – a different one every night – trying to comfort him. Luffy never got over Ace’s death. Law knows it, it’s written on his fucking forehead, but this is the first time he sees him like this. The first time since two years.  
He saw his sad look when Luffy talks about him, he saw the streak of dry tears late at night, he saw the way he touches his scar when his thoughts drift away, he saw all the words he can’t bring himself to say and he saw all the tears he never allowed himself to cry. But this is the first time he sees _this_ and this is scaring him.  
This is scaring him because he doesn’t know how to deal with it. And he doesn’t want to make things more complicated than they already are, he doesn’t want Luffy to feel worse.  
  
He looks down at what Luffy intensely looks since earlier: his hands, covered in blood. Law heard from Jinbei that this could be a trigger. A lot of things can be a trigger but this one is particularly hurtful and vivid. To try to bring him back, Law grabs Luffy’s hands, gently, and he wipes them with his own kimono. The blood already started to dry so it was hard to clean everything away, but it was better than nothing. “Strawhat- _ya_ , come on, look at me.” He grabs his shoulders, he tries to catch his attention, but Luffy stays still like he wasn’t there.  
  
Law curses under his breath.  
He hates to see this expression on Luffy’s face, the fear and the despair, the urge to scream but the vocal cords that don’t want to work, stuck somewhere in the past. The guilt, _fuck, the guilt_. Law knows that the younger captain feels guilty of his brother’s death, he knows it very well and he is familiar with the feeling. Of course he is – how many times did he blame himself for Cora-san’s death? How many times did he think about how he could have changed how it happened? How many times did he feel guilty because Vergo found them, that it was his fault? How many times did he convince himself that _everything_ was his fault?  
He can only understand Luffy. He cups his head in his hands, forcing him to look at him. “It’s not your fault.” He simply says but he feels like Luffy doesn’t even hear him. His eyes are looking far behind him, like he wasn’t even there.  
  
Law bites his lips.  
He hates it, he _hates_ it. He hates to see such a sad expression on Luffy’s face, he hates to see something other than a big sunshine smile on his lips. He can’t stand it anymore. Kikoku falls on his side.  
  
He pulls Luffy into a hug, holding him tightly like he was going to disappear if he let go. “Try to match my breathing,” he tries again. Luffy doesn’t move, erratic breathing against his left ear, his whole body is shaking. Law closes his eyes, cursing under his breath, a hand in Luffy’s hair and the other on his back. He knows how hard it can be to keep the younger captain grounded after a nightmare…  
But now, this isn’t a nightmare. And Law doesn’t know if it’s better or worse.  
  
He feels like he is back at Marineford, too, in the infirmary room of the submarine, treating the re-opened wounds of Strawhat, he and his never-ending silence. “I couldn’t.” Law whispers. He finally answers that question Luffy asked him two years ago. “I couldn’t save your brother. Nobody could. But… but I should have tried, at least.” The words are choking him up. “I am so sorry.” _It’s my fault if you are like this, right now_ , he wants to say. But he stops himself.  
He is pretty sure Luffy already knows how much he feels guilty when he looks at that huge scar on his chest, and right now, he doesn’t need to remember that on top of everything else.  
  
And then, he can feel Luffy move. He grabs fistfuls of his kimono, his nails digging into the fabric, a raw sob escapes his lips before he could say anything. Law feels his shoulder becoming wet but he doesn’t care. He gently stokes the other back, murmuring soft words into his ears, as he tries to ignore his own trembling voice. (He remembers the words Luffy told him, weeks ago; about how he is _always holding everything inside_ _and_ _never spill_ _ing_ _it out…_ But to whom these words were really directed? He, or Luffy himself?)  
He just holds him, afraid he will fall apart if he let go.  
  
  
“I miss him so _much—_ ” Luffy chokes out between two sobs, his forehead against Law’s wet shoulder.  
  
  
“I know.” Law simply says. There’s no need to say more. _H_ _e knows_ , he knows what it feels like to lose a loved one, he knows what it feels to have this emptiness inside his chest, he knows what it feels like to see them again in dreams only to wake up, miserable, reality slapping hard against his face, he knows what it feels like to panic when unwelcome memories start to come back without warning, when the world crumbles down again.  
He knows. And he can’t do anything else. So, he just stays here, Luffy crying in his arms, stroking his hair, he just stays _here_. And it’s everything that matters.  
  
(From time to time, Law looks around them, just in case the danger would come and surprise them… after all, they were in the midst of a battle when it happened. He lets his room up, just in case.)  
  


As time passes, Luffy slowly calms down, his voice dying until he ends up quiet, so quiet Law thinks for a second that the younger captain fell asleep. But he looks up from the surgeon’s shoulder and their gazes meet, puffy and red eyes, running nose and dry tears on his red cheeks. “Okay?” Law asks, still not letting go.  
  
“Okay.” Luffy mumbles under his breath as he wipes his eyes. “Please, don’t say anything to anyone.”  
  
“I won’t.” The older captain finally lets go of Luffy as he gets up, looking around at their surroundings, just in case. Then, he holds out his hand to Luffy who hurries to grab it and he gets up too. He seems embarrassed, but the expression on his face is quickly replaced by a smile. A smile sadder than usual, a smile that doesn’t seem very genuine, but still a smile.  
Law smiles back. He starts walking, heading to their hideout, in silence.  
  
They only let go of their hands when they start to see the crumbling house, hiding between old trees and bushes.

  
  


* * *

  
**+1**

Heavy breathing. A cough.  
Law looks up at the bright sky, shinning sun and blinding clouds, every shades of light blue, warm rays of sunshine on his cheeks.  
  
  
  
Well. At least, it is a beautiful day to die.  
  
  
  
Lying on fresh and wet grass, he looks away. He looks at his chest, covered in blood and bullets holes (ha… this feels _familiar_ ). He looks at Kikoku, lying two meters away from him, far away from his reach. He looks at his left arm, a single sea prism stone handcuff tight around his wrist, eating away the few vitality he still had. He looks at the flowers surrounding him, their scent covering the blood’s one.  
Then he closes his eyes. (He doesn’t even remember how he ended up like this. Does it really matter, anyway…?)  
  
So, the death he wished for so long is finally right in front of him.  
(But, then, why does he feel… like this isn’t what he really desired? Like maybe he wants to live a little longer?)  
  
He did everything he had to do in his life. He survived his illness, he avenged Cora-san, Domaflingo is out of the way, Kaido is defeated. Well, he didn’t find the One Piece, but to be honest… being king wouldn’t suit him, anyway. (There can be only one king; and, over time, he decided that the king wouldn’t be him but Luffy. As simple as that.) No regrets, no tears, just a peaceful smile and he is ready to welcome his death, finally.  
After all, he fooled death for more than thirteen years. His life should have stopped much earlier. There’s nothing to win when playing with death and Law always knew, he always knew it would catch him up one day or another. And today is the day.  
  
  


“Toraooo!”  
  
  
Of course this stupid Luffy won’t let him die peacefully. _Of course_. How could he _dare_ to think otherwise?  
  
  
Law cracks an eye open to see the younger captain running to him, worry showing on his face. He drops on his knees and he tries to smile but it doesn’t last long. He probably notices that Law doesn’t have much more time to live. “I got your keys!” Luffy says, with a laugh that lacks his usual enthusiasm. “Well, actually, I don’t know which key it is b— but I’ll find out!”  
  
The surgeon looks at the bunch of keys. Two dozens of identical keys. No way to differentiate them. No way to know which one is the good one. Luffy doesn’t wait any longer to try testing all the keys, and Law notices his care to not touch the sea prism stone – which is a bit hard when trying to unlock handcuffs.  
Stupid.  
  
“Go away, Strawhat- _ya_. Run away while you can—”  
  
“What? Nonsense!”  
  
“You can’t save me… I already lost too much blood. Even if you unlock my cuffs right now, I am afraid I won’t make it.” (If he is so sure and _o_ _kay_ with his death, then why does it hurt that much?)  
  
“Shut up! You’re not dying!”  
  
“You can’t fool me. I am a doctor, I know when I—”  
  
“You don’t understand!” Luffy stops testing the keys for a second, he grasps fists-full of grass. He looks angrily at Law, with that _you can’t die_ look in his eyes. “Is there something to understand?” The question is genuine, Law _does not_ understand what Luffy means. Is it his _you_ _told me you won’t_ _die_ bullshit again or promises they can’t keep? Why care about this right now?  
  
But then he quickly understands.  
He understands when Luffy’s warm hands (still a bit wet from grabbing the grass—) find their way on his pale cheeks, when he leans on him, when Law notices glimpses of tears in his eyes, when a pair of lips crashes on his own. Thumbs gently stoke his cheeks and then Luffy breaks the kiss; Law swears his heart stops when he sees how the younger captain seems on the verge of crying.  
(Luffy’s lips taste of sunshine and salt and adventure.)  
  
Fuck. Of course.  
Law just looks at him for a second but Luffy quickly looks away from him, face twisted in a mixture of anger and deep sadness as he tests the keys again. How could he be so blind? It is so obvious that Luffy loves him and the older captain feels stupid to have not noticed it sooner.

He feels even more stupid to have not noticed that _he_ loves him back.  
  
Minutes away from a certain death. It’s too bad. It’s too bad and Law wishes he could enjoy a bit longer this warm feeling in his chest. He wishes he could enjoy a bit longer Luffy’s warm. Does he deserve it? Does he deserve to be loved? Those questions never stopped to turn in his mind, since Cora-san died for him, since he was all alone, with only his thoughts to accompany him. For a long time, he thought he couldn’t be able to love or to be loved – who would love a strange and cold man like him, anyway? He was afraid of love and he was trying to ignore all of this. He _didn’t deserve_ it, anyway.

  
  
But then Luffy taught him that he deserved to be loved.  
A bit late, unfortunately.

  
  
“Luffy- _ya_ …” He turns his head towards the younger captain. Then he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know what to say anymore, he doesn’t know what to do anymore. He doesn’t know anything anymore and he just feels overwhelmed, he just feels weak and _dying_ , he just feels like his heart is being pulled from his chest. A sad, hurt smile appears on his lips and he feels hot tears slowly falling from his eyes. His voice is nothing but a whisper. “…Why now?”  
  
He looks at how Luffy deeply tries not to cry but quickly fails as tears roll down his face. “I don’t want any more regrets.”  
  
_Clic_. This is the good key.  
Luffy wipes his eyes before he tries to kick away the handcuffs without touching it or hurting Law. After the sea prism stone handcuff is far away from him, Law feels a bit better. _Just_ a bit. Maybe he won’t die, after all, maybe his self-diagnosis was wrong because of the handcuffs draining his energy, who knows? Luffy stretches out his arm, retrieves back Kikoku and he draws closer to Law, helping him to sit up. He stops for a second and then he gently wraps his arms around him, careful not to hurt him more than he already is, closing his eyes. He breathes. “I told you I would find you something to live for,” he whispers, the scent of the blood strong in his nose, “this is it. Please, Law, live for _me_.”  
  
Law smiles, his head heavily dropping on Luffy’s shoulder. “I’d gladly do.”  
  
“Good.”  
  
Then, without waiting anymore, Luffy throws the older captain on his shoulder, and he starts to run towards what Law guesses to be the Sunny. Ha, this _feels very familiar_. Law feels himself slowly slipping away from consciousness, but Luffy’s voice keeps him awake. He can’t even register what he is saying or if this is important.

  
  
Maybe he won’t die, after all.  
  


  
Law closes his eyes.


End file.
